Mister Prince
by ShinigamiLenne
Summary: ONESHOT, Yuffie ponders about where her prince could be. A bit of Yuffentine if you squint super-deeeee-duper hard.


First attempt at Final Fantasy, Yuffie, and Vincent! And lame attempt at Yuffentine? Did I manage it? Or did I just absolutely PHAIL? Advise me, oh wise people of FFnet!

Oh I _wish _I could own Vincent, but Yuffie? Not so much.

* * *

My head wanders around sometimes. By that I don't mean like, my head pops off of my neck and flies off, going whoosh whoosh! That would be _so _freaking cool though.

But, I digress. Ooh, didn't know I could use BIG words, didya? Didn't think so.

As I was saying, my head wanders around sometimes. I start thinking stuff like, how does Cloud gets his hair to stick up the way it is? It defies the laws of freaking gravity! Crazy Chocobo head.

How did Tifa get such gigantic boobs? They're like Double freaking D's! Scratch that. They _are_ Double freaking D's! I'm so jealous, gahh, curse my nonexistent boobies!

Then there's the, how come my life isn't a fairytale? Well, I guess it's _kinda_ like a fairytale. I mean, I got the evil parent, even though he's not exactly evil _stepmother_. That'd be weird, cause Godo's a guy and a stepmother's a girl, and I'll just stop now.

So, I've even got the whole princess thing down, right?

Ha!

Bet you forgot little ol' Yuffie's a Princess now, eh?

Well, need I remind you that I am the Great Ninja Yuffie™, the Single White Rose of Wutai, and unfortunately, Godo's daughter.

I'm pretty sure you remembered that, cause who could forget such an important fact about such an important person, but I was just reminding you just in case!

Moving on, so how come my life isn't a fairytale? I'm a princess, right? And a pretty kickass princess at that! My life has even got the whole, 'save the world thing' going on every now and then, and who other than I, ninja extraordinaire, is there to save the day!

But there's one thing that I think that only exists in the fairytales.

My prince in shining armor!

Or, my prince-in-not-so-shiny-armor-that-has-yet-to-shown-up.

Gawd, what. A. Hobo.

So, I've decided to write a letter! Seventh Heaven is in its Happy Hour, so no one should notice little ol' me sitting on one of the stools writing a whacky old letter, right?

_Dear Mister Prince._

Hooray, I started it! But now I'm stuck. Do I insult him? Or do I beg for him to come and rescue me? Maybe a mix of both.

_You know, a princess can only deal with a certain amount of silver haired men in black trench coats that wanna take over the Planet and rule over everyone like the evil whack job genius he is, before she needs her prince. That being said, WHERE ARE YOU?_

That guy with the lazy eye in the corner looks at me freaky weird just cus I'm scribbling all hard so Mister Prince can see the emphasis I'm putting on a few words, what a jerk.

_I could be living a fairytale life here! I have everything that is required you see, EXCEPT - dot dot dot insert drum roll here - you! It'd be nice if you could find it in yourself to get offa your lazy buttocks please, that would be very much appreciated. XOXO, The Great Ninja Yuffie Kisaragi™!_

Not much of begging, but oh well. You have to be firm with these kinda people! And maybe if he was more punctual, I'd be more polite!

Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

Now it's time to stretch, cause all that letter writing really gave my fingers a workout

"VINNIE! Are you trying to give me a heart attack or what?" Yeah, so I turn around and guess who's there? Mister Valentine himself, in all his creepy vampire-ness.

"My apologies," he says, in that icky monotone and creepy blank stare of his. Somebody's gotta show this guy the glory that is…wait for it…facial expressions! So, while I'm busy having deep and intellectual thoughts, Vince here interrupts my genius by going, "Now who might Mister Prince be?"

Oh no he didn't! I never knew was such a nosy guy.

I'll just play it cool.

"Whatever are you talking about Vinnie?" Puppy dog face time! Come on Yuffs, this ain't so hard. Kekekeke, hey wait. All this staring is getting to me. Now that I get a good look at Vinnie, he's kinda Prince-like material, isn't he? A very emo prince though. LIGHT BULB! A prince is a prince and beggars can't be choosers.

"VINNIE!" I say it so loud, his usual stoic face of stoic-ness goes into a 'WOAH' one for like, a millisecond.

"…Yes, Yuffie?"

"From now on, you are Mister Prince!"

Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

Vampire never knew what hit him.


End file.
